Happy happy Joy joy

You know what i realized the other day? I'm happy. Like, really happy. I'd say this is the happiest I been in my life (kindergarten doesn't count, cause I didn't know any better). Its just that so many aspects of my life are coming together in ways i didn't image.

My home. I am a naturally messy person. Just ask Liz or Joi. Or Erin. Or any of my family. And its not like my mom didn’t try to reform me. It just doesn't come naturally for me like it does for many other people. And I used to think that it didn't bother me too much when things were messy. But I was wrong. It totally stifled me, and my creativity. I dreaded coming home, cause I was hard to get to my desk cause stuff was piled up high. And we had nothing to eat cause all of our dishes were dirty and piled high on the counter tops. And no clean clothes to wear. So you were most likely to find me slumped over my keyboard in sweatpants and a t-shirt, wasting hours on the internet. Any time some one would ask to stop by, I'd go into panic cleaning mode, tossing everything into the bedroom til the bed was piled high with crap. Then when it came time to go to bed, everything would get pushed onto the floor....but it would never get picked up from the floor. So the next dash and stash would only make it worse. Well, I guess it isn't surprising that neither of us were sleeping very well.

It got to the point when Dear Hubby finally begged me to change. To do something, anything that would make things better. So of course, I turned to the internet. Luckily for me, I found FlyLady. Suddenly little by little, our "house" started to change. My sink was shinny, so the dishes started to get washed. Then stuff started to get put away, and the things I didn't love so much anymore, got donated. That went for clothes too. So all of a sudden, I don't have as many clothes to wash (Goodbye Mt. Washmore!). Now once a month, I can actually figure out what we're going to eat, so that I can buy the groceries to feed us. And I discovered we have a table! No more dinner every night on the couch because we can't find the table. (We still eat at the coffee table often, but now, its a choice, not necessity.)

The wonderful thing is, I look forward to going home. Our apartment has become our own little retreat. Clean towels when ever we want. A beautifully decorated bedroom. A well stocked kitchen with good healthy foods. A welcoming livingroom to relax it. And it takes so little work! I promise! Remember, I HATE house cleaning!

My health. Now that I make the effort to keep our kitchen full of good food, and our menus planned, we aren't eating out as much. Not nearly as much. Which means healthier foods that are good for our bodies. Its amazing the difference that one thing can make. Its so much better for our bank account too! I can feed the two of us for a month for $170-$200, but if we eat out regularly, we can easily spend more than $400 a month in food. That is ridiculous.

And now that I am getting gentle reminders every day from Flylady to get up and move my body for 15 minutes (you can do anything for fifteen minutes), I've actually started to get into shape. I've added sit-ups to my morning routine, not to too many to start, just enough. But it has become a habit. And you know, its not as dreadful as I thought.

Flylady also taught me that if its not fun, it won't get done. So I realized that I need to love my exercise to actually do it. So I went out and bought Dance Dance Revolution (for Playstation)! Cause I love to dance! And man, can I tell you what a good work out that is. So I can actually look forward to exercising. Imagine that.

My beauty. I've never really felt beautiful. Pretty I'll agree to. But never on a regular basis felt beautiful. Well, Flylady makes us get up every morning, put on the clothes we picked out the night before (and therefore had the time to actually pick out a nice outfit from our decluttered clothes), do our hair and face, and put on our shoes. Every morning. Work or no work. So for the first time in my life, I actually consistently wash my face TWICE a day. Wow, I always thought I had oily skin. Turns out, its actually dry! Eeeew =p This of course means I wear LESS makeup, cause I have less to cover up. Which give me more time to curl my hair pretty, and make my eyes all sexy.

And since I know how good I look cause I took the time to actually get ready, I feel better. Every time I catch a glance in a mirror, I smile in surprise. And the compliments from the people I work with make me feel a million miles tall. MissusSmartyPants has help with this too, by teaching me what kind of clothes actually work on my body, and by saving me money.

My inner child and creativity. Did you know we all have an inner brat? I bet many of you have already met mine. Dear Hubby was not surprised at all when I informed him that I had one. Apparently, he has been dealing with her for years. You see, I met Emmy Lou through TheBratFactor. Everything about that website makes total sense. You see, I have been ignoring her, and ignoring a needy four year old is not a good idea. She causes trouble. And makes messes. But now, she has her own blog. And we have frequent conversations. When she wants something that is bad for her, I recognize it for what it is...a four year old wanting her way. So I gently tell her no. Instead, we can do something else that is just as fun, but not as bad for us.

But she is much happier since I had my "AH-HA!" moment. It used to be, I got home tired from work, and had to motivate myself to clean the dishes, or pick up the house. It sucked. Then one morning, I got up early, and got ready quickly. I realized that I had time to kill before leaving for work. So I washed up a few dishes, straighten the living room, picked up my clothes, and before I realized it, in the 15 minutes before leaving for work, I had done all my housework for the day. That’s when Emmy Lou tapped me on the shoulder and asked, "Does this mean we can play when we get home?" :o Oh my gosh. It does. We can PLAY when we get home! No house work! It was the best feeling in the world. And the greatest freedom!

Because of this freedom, and Emmy Lou's creativity, we are playing again like we haven't in a long time. I've got creativity coming out of my...fingertips. I picked up sculpting again with polymer clay. And I found out, I'm GOOD at it. Like, good enough to make money. Maybe good money! :o Imagine that!

My finances. Yup. Flylady is helping with that too (Emmy Lou: Crown Financial too! Don't forget 'em!). Making us sit down and look at how we are spending and what we are spending money on. We actually have a budget now. One that I'm actually keeping tract of. And we have a plan for paying off our credit card debt so that we can get a house. I may take a while (may not!), but we have a plan, and are sticking to it. Plus this gave us the freedom so that Dear Hubby could quit his part-time miserable day job and start freelancing for home. And already is he making more freelancing that we was working miserable hours at the old job. So much better!

My relationships. I've been realizing a lot about myself, and my life and how I've gotten where I am today. It is very enlightening. And makes a huge difference in my relationships. It helps me communicate better with Dear Hubby. And with everyone else to. Also affects the decisions I make (Emmy Lou: I do that too!)

My spirituality. With the peace in my house, come another kinda of peace. I realized that I don't spend much time with the Lord. And now that all those other annoying distractions are removed, it came more into focus. So as part of my morning routine, I can stop and take the time to read my bible, and pray. I've picked up Desiring God by Piper, and have been taking my time, reading through it and letting it stew. And I'm loving it.

My work: I realized just recently that there are some minor little things at work that tend to drive me insane. Like one: I work in a dungeon. No windows. Only one little glass door...far far away. This drives Emmy Lou bonkers, she needs sunlight, she's like a little solar panel. (Emmy Lou: And these florescent lights are sucking my soul from my body out of my eyeballs!) Well, I realized, I have the ability to walk outside for 15 minutes. Then I found our quiet spot. (SWINGS!) Its a little play ground on the church that is tucked away on a hill. And yes, it has a swing. So we can go get some sunlight, and recharge our batteries for 15 minutes. Then Emmy Lou will let me work.

I also decided to change up my office. Well, its more like a work room. But now, its a tropical escape! Really! I moved all the furniture around into a more pleasing, relaxing way. Brought in some plants and flowers. Brought in a floor lamp (No more soul sucking lights!). I put up huge picture of a beach scene to cover our white board, so now I'm staring at the ocean...instead of the white wall. And to go with that, I downloaded this little ambient sound software that plays different relaxing sounds. Like the ocean. So now I'm at the beach, listening to the waves and birds, while working on my laptop. (Waiter! Bring me a strawberry daiquiri! Now!)



So that is what I mean when I say that I am happy. I really am. Emmy Lou is doing her "Happy Dance" over in the corner. Cause we get to play tonight.

PS. xp
Erin, Emmy Lou is sticking her tongue out at you because I made her paste this whole post into word to spell check it. And there were a lot of errors. And I fixed them.